Hinata's Reasons
by rallybabe89
Summary: There was a reason Hyuuga Hinata wanted to become Head of the Hyuuga clan & it had nothing to do with wanting power. For once she wanted to show the one she loved that she was strong enough for his attention. Hyuugacest,NejiHina One shot


**Disclaimer: Naruto is not owned by me.**

**This is my first time writing NEJIHINA...meaning its Hyuugacest, meaning relative with relative. If that bugs you then don't read it. Reviews are much appreciated.**

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There was a reason that Hinata didn't want to step down from being the head of the Hyuuga clan. 

She had to prove herself to the one that she loved. She needed to show him that she was strong enough for his love.

She had spent countless years trying to get his attention. She trained everyday and every night. She fought until she could fight no longer.

For Hinata his acceptance of her was crucial. Just like Gaara had needed to kill to have a reason for his existence, Hinata needed his acceptance of her for verify hers.

She wanted his attention on her. She wanted to be the sole recipient of his attention. She hated that his female teammate received more time, more affection, more of him overall. She hated feeling like this.

Hinata looked down at the scroll on her desk. She had scribbled the initial N all over her paper. Not leaving a single inch open. No matter how much she wanted to write out his full name she couldn't. She was still too weak to face the elders, and the villages. She knew that if they found out about her desire for him she would be shunned. She could never get his attention that way.

She would never be able to face everyone until he felt the same for her.

He was her strength, her weakness, her protector, her love.

Hinata sat up from her desk and headed out into the moonlit training grounds.

This was one of his habits that she picked up from all the time she spent trailing him.

She stood in her stance and moved her feet in such graciously. Training had always seemed to relax him, and she had followed his example and started training whenever she was emotionally unstable.

He was gone on a mission but she knew she could feel him. No matter how long or how far he was gone she always felt that she had a piece of him in her heart. The need to be close to him was what drove her to pretend to be so useless and weak in front of her father, even though she could fight well in a battle.

She wanted him to be there to protect her. To take care of her. To be near her even if it was all false.

"Hinata-sama, what are you doing out here so late?" asked a white eyed ninja. He had his mission clothes on and had recently returned from a mission.

"Neji-san you're back from your mission already?" she had recently dropped calling him nii-san to try and get her point across to him. She wanted to be more than that. She needed to be more than that.

Neji cringed slightly when he didn't hear the nii-san added to his name. He merely nodded and hned in response to her question. She was now the head Hyuuga but he knew that she would tolerate his behavior.

That was the thing about her, the thing that drove Neji crazy. She was always tolerating, always trying to stop people's pain, and always being nice to everyone. For years, he couldn't understand why she was so nice. People were always treating her like scum, telling her she was weak. In fact he was one of those people. Although he had sat her down and told her why he was like that towards her. That was his way of showing her that he cared, that he would be the strong one, that she was allowed to be weak, and that she needed to prove herself to the elders. But tonight he needed to know why she stopped calling him nii-san. He loved hearing her say his name with nii-san at the end of it. He felt close to her, he felt like he was connected to her. It was a feeling he didn't feel with anyone. When Hanabi called him nii-san it didn't feel the same as when Hinata spoke his name with the honor.

"Hinata-sama, why did you stop calling me nii-san?"

Hinata dipped her head low. She was about to embarrass herself. She had long gotten over her stutter but somehow she knew that she couldn't say the next few sentences without stuttering.

"Well uh N-neji I thought that you d-deserve more respect than just being my nii san. You mean more to me uh than just my cousin," Hinata tried to tell him without spilling out a confession of her feelings.

Ever since the Chuunin exams the two of them had gotten closer. Neji had trained her and even talked to her about his problems some times. He came to understand the duties of the main and branch houses. Together the two of them had started to change the traditions of the family, no longer was being in the branch house a punishment, and no longer was there animosity between the two houses. Now there was an understanding, a peace, and most of all a love between them.

The only thing Hinata could now wish for is Neji to want her as much as she wanted him. She looked down at the ground playing with her fingers waiting for his response.

Neji was going through turmoil in his own mind. Did his Hinata just tell him that she wanted to be more than simply his cousin? He never could remember when he fell in love with her. Maybe when he was a mere child standing next to his father commenting on how she was cute. Or maybe after Naruto left and he could have all of her attention? Or was it when she came to him after Kiba broke up with her? He didn't care when or how it happened. All that he knew was that she had always belonged to him; he just had to reach out and ask her to accept him.

"Hinata sama, I am more than your cousin. I thought you knew that already," Neji answered.

Did he mean that? Did he mean that I was more than his cousin that I meant more to him than that?

"I'll walk you back inside. It's too late for the head to be out like this," said Neji reaching for her hand and pulling her inside. Neji had finally grasped her hand now all he needed to do was tell her the truth.

"Nejinii-san, whhhat do I uh mean to you?"

_'This is your chance Neji. Take it. She wants to know what she means to you. Tell her. Let her know everything. Before you lose her forever.'_

"Hinata sama, you mean the world to me. You are not only my cousin, you are my best friend, the person who cares for me without limits, the person I care for without limits, you are my life, my world, and more importantly you are my love." Neji looked at Hinata who had stopped walking and was now looking down at her feet.

_'Neji loves me? He feels the same way I feel?'_ Hinata felt confusion going through her heart. The man she so desperately wanted felt the same as she did.

Hinata was unable to stand on her own two feet. With all of emotions running through her she couldn't hold onto consciousness any longer. Her body gave way and she fainted only to have Neji catch her.

_'I s__cared Hinata. She was probably never expecting me to say something like that. I should have known that she still cared about Naruto. She has his initials written all over every scroll in her office. But at least I got my feelings out. At least now that if she rejects me I won't ponder about the what ifs._' Neji thought as he picked her up and took her to her room. He found that it was open and laid her on her bed. He would stay until she regained consciousness.

He rummaged through her stuff to try and find something to keep his mind off of her. Going through her desks he found her journal.

It had a light purple cover with butterflies printed on it. She had probably kept a lot of heartfelt things in it because it had a lock on it. Neji knew that she probably didn't realize that in a house full of Byakugan users it would be useless to have a lock on it; they could simply look through the cover and into the sheets.

Neji activated his Byakugan and scanned through the sheets of his little angel's journal.

After reading the first few entries he realized that his angel was madly in love with someone. He noticed that she had written the initial N all over the entries of her journal. He thought it was a cute habit of hers. Neji went on to read about Hinata's heartbreak whenever she tried to get this certain guy's attention. He could feel his vein's pumping with anger as he fought off waking his cousin up and letting her know that crying over a guy who didn't notice you was just not worth it. He continued to read and find out why Hinata took the head Hyuuga position to help her love from being judged or taken away from her. Neji was confused at this.

'_Why would Naruto be taken away from her if she wasn't the head?_' he wondered. In fact being the head while he was the Hokage could cause problems between the two. She would have to worry about the clan as well as the village. He switched his vision to a deeper page, a more recent entry.

'He will never notice me in the way I want him to. He spends so much time with me, does so many things with me, yet somehow doesn't seem to acknowledge me. Am I that worthless, that weak, and that insignificant that he would rather sit next to me in silence than say a word of compassion towards me? His bun-haired teammate gets more attention from him than I do. It's just not fair.'

_'Hinata sama wants some guy's attention and is suffering to gain it. Why can't she see that Naruto is just not worth it? He spends too much time obsessing over Sakura to even notice Hinata-sama. But wait did Hinata sama say something about a bun haired teammate. As far as I know the only bun haired female is on my team. Does that mean she's vying for Lee's attention? I hope she knows that dropout is not worth her attention. She deserves much better. She deserves a genius with the ability to take care of her, she deserves me.'_ Thought Neji.

Never once did Neji even consider that Hinata might love him. He still felt worthless after nearly killing her during the Chuunin exams.

Hinata stirred in her sleep and subconsciously scratched her arm. Neji had taken off her long sleeved jacket and now noticed that she was rubbing her arm quite frequently.

'_She's probably itchy, maybe she had dry skin. Whatever it is it'll give me an excuse to touch her,'_ thought Neji as he approached her with a bottle of lotion.

Slowly he rolled up her shirt sleeve and without looking at her arm he reached to place some lotion on his hands. Taking the lotion he went to place his fingers on her skin when he noticed that she had marks on her. The silent, ever caring Hinata was a cutter. Not only did she cut but she carved a name into her arm. A name that Neji never thought he would see. **His** name, NEJI. His name was not only written once or twice but extended up towards her elbow and was repeated multiple times. Neji took his finger and traced the letters of his name on her arm. Never did his name look so beautiful. Then realization hit him, his Hinata had caused herself pain over him. She had taken to mar her perfect skin but carving his not-so-perfect name into it. Neji took the lotion and started to ease the pain Hinata was going through. He then decided to pull into the bed alongside her. There was no way he would be away from her. He grabbed her waist ever so delicately and pulled her near him, allowing her body to contour to his.

He had already told her that he cared deeply for her, and now that he had seen his name written on her body he didn't care if the entire world was against this, as long as she loved him everything would be alright.

There was no reason to voice their affection for each other when they awoke the next morning. Hinata had opened her eyes ever so slightly only to realize she was looking straight into her cousin's chest. Backing out of his grasp she noticed blood trickling from his shirt's arm. Rolling it up she leaned closer to inspect why her dear was bleeding. The only thing she could see before tears dripped out of her eyes was her name carved deeply into his arm. She leaned up and woke him with a kiss that could heal all the pains of the world. Together they lay for the rest of time with each baring the mark of who they loved.

That was why Hinata chose to become the Head of the Hyuuga clan, to free Neji from his unwanted mark and to grant him a new one. From the caged bird to the beloved dove.

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**I hope that was good. Please leave some constructive criticism. My english teacher told me I need to improve my writing skills. So I ask you for help.**

**Much luv 3 **


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